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Parker: Statham Does Statham
Directed by Taylor Hackford – a man whose impressive Hollywood résumé includes hits such as An Officer and a Gentleman and Ray – and adapted to the screen by John J. McLaughlin, Parker is messy, predictable and fails to avoid classic crime-drama clichés. So where does it all go wrong?
The film opens up with a heist at an Ohio State Fair, where Parker (Statham), along with a team of four other felons, embezzle a score of one million dollars. The job is successful, but during the car ride home, the team of thugs turn on Parker after he refuses to give up his share of the money.
After being shot by his frenemies, Parker is left for dead. Naturally, this is one killing machine that isn't so easy to get rid of. After a quick recovery, he goes on to plan his revenge, along with the help of a former mentor (Nolte) and his loyal girlfriend, Claire (Booth). His first stop is Palm Beach, where the rest of the gang is making plans for another big hit – a billion-dollar bling steal. However, in order to exact his revenge, he needs the help of financially-bruised real estate broker, Leslie (Lopez) – who's more than happy to get her hands on a little bit of commission.
This is not a awful film per se, but it's difficult to defend. Granted, the story stays true to Parker's no-frills style of criminality, but it's his code of ethics that is questionable; he doesn't hurt anyone that doesn't deserve it.
In fairness, there are a few bursts of energy and some of the action sequences are pretty solid, but it's nothing different to the usual Hollywood spiel. Overall, very little heart or creativity seems to have been put into the plot, which also happens to be extremely long for this type of film. The direction is lazy, the characters are overwritten and Hackford's habit of throwing gratuitous flashbacks at you is downright annoying.
We're sick of questioning why Statham keeps taking the same roles, but this time round, he lacks the needed charm and charisma to hold up what is a slightly more substantial storyline.
The cowboy hats and dodgy southern accents are hilarious and although Statham and J-Lo share zero on-screen chemistry, the Latina princess manages to keep her character grounded in a sea of folly.
Predictable and cluttered, Statham fans will have a field day with this one, but will soon forget about it after the credits roll.
What can you say about the seemingly unstoppable force that is Nicolas Cage that hasn’t been said before? A magnet for the most troubled, muddled and just generally exasperating films to hit cinemas in the last five years, his latest work in USS Indianapolis: Men of Courage does nothing to change his fortunes.
Despite being based on one a true story that has all the makings of a war epic, the Mario Van Peebles-directed USS Indianapolis bleeds all and any gravitas and emotion out of its incredibly dramatic source material.
The story goes as thus: the eponymous US Navy cruiser delivered the first parts of the atomic bomb that would go on to devastate Hiroshima, before being torpedoed by the Japanese navy, leaving some 300 of the 1000-plus crewmen dead and the rest stranded in shark-infested waters. Said sharks, along with dehydration and salt water poisoning, leave just over 300 survivors to be rescued.
At the centre of the ensuing hubbub is Cage’s Captain McVay, who many, very unreasonably, blame for the death of the 700 or so victims – so you see, it’s a very complex story, but one that very quickly descend into and exercise on how not to make a war film.
The occasional laughable CGI aside, Cage is oddly sedate, bordering on placid, in his role – yes, the central character is possibly the flattest element of the film, while seasoned actors, Tom Sizemore and Thomas Jane, are given little to chew on in their respective roles.
While starting exactly as one would expect a war film to, the wreckage part of the film turns into cheap disaster movie, before turning into a courtroom drama in the final act. It’s a muddle of a film that fails to really drum to the beat of McVay’s potentially brilliant arc as a firm commander that eventually buckles under the unjust pressure he receives back at home.
Bad CGI, a mammoth two hour-plus running time and Nic Cage can be forgiven, but what’s at the heart of this film’s mess is the script. Jumping from event to event, plotline to plotline, at a whim, with Cage’s soft murmured speech used to pave over the transitions, USS Indianapolis’s pacing is that of a film hurrying to stuff as many ideas and threads as possible – expect that’s not the case. Van Peebles tries so hard to build the layers of an epic, when, actually, all he needed to do was tell this simple but stirring story as it is.
As an exploration of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in the military, Dito Montiel’s Man Down is a muddled story that’s pretty challenging to sit through. Though on paper there’s plenty of potential depth in this particular effect of war – and a solid cast at its disposable – the film descends into military-movie clichés, while not really keeping up with its complex set-up.
The movie to take place over four separate time periods and opens with U.S Marine Gabriel Drummer (LeBeouf) and his military buddy, Devin Roberts (Courtney), making their way through a vast and seemingly wasted American landscape which appears to have been destroyed by a chemical attack. On the look-out for survivors, the pair is hoping to find Drummer’s son, Jonathan (Shotwell), whom he believes has been kidnapped.
Before the audience gets a chance to find out what is really going in, the story flashes back to another time period where a seemingly distraught Drummer is being interviewed by Counselor Peyton (Oldman) about an ‘incident’ that occurred on the battlefield in Afghanistan. Moving on to yet to another period, we also get to see the story of Drummer and Roberts during their Marine Corps training at Camp Lejeune before, eventually, cutting to the story of Drummer’s life at home with wife, Natalie (Mara) and their son.
Taking on several narrative threads without really knowing where to take them, let alone how to put them back together, is one of Man Down’s major issues. Used to give some kind of visual interpretation of PTSD, the movie’s choppy editing is ineffective and comes across as a messy, superficial tool.
Clocking in at precisely ninety minutes, Man Down is a relatively short film but, thanks to the overworked script and slow pace, it takes forever for any of the stories to build into something bigger.
Working its way through a series of military clichés, the story works best when it is focused on digging into Drummer’s fractured mind, with the conversation between him and his counsellor – played by the seemingly wasted talent of one Gary Oldman – serving to be one of the movie’s best elements. LeBeouf is convincing as a troubled soldier desperately trying not to sink deeper into madness and his commitment to the role is commendable, making it all that more frustrating to see that the script itself is so lacking.