Texas Chainsaw 3D: Stale & Predictable Horror
- Alexandra DaddarioDan Yeager...
- John Luessenhop
- In 1 Cinema
With the arrival
of the seventh addition to the long-running Texas
Chainsaw franchise, creator Tobe Hooper’s originality, bloodcurdling horror
and gory terror has yet to be matched.
enough, Texas Chainsaw 3D is no exception.
starts off with the final scene from the 1974 original when Leatherface, along
with his family members, get ambushed and allegedly killed, before their home
is burned to the ground by the people of Newt, Texas.
Many years later, a grocery shop butcher, Heather Miller (Daddario), learns
that she has inherited a home in Texas from a grandmother she never knew.
After a brief confrontation with her parents, Heather learns that she was
adopted. Angry and hurt by the disturbing revelations, she finds comfort
in boyfriend Ryan (Songz), trampy friend Nikki (Raymonde) and Nikki’s side-kick,
Kenny (Malicki-Sanchez). Her buds offer their support and accompany her to
Texas to visit her family estate and collect her inheritance.
kick-off when the group stumbles on the only surviving member of the Sawyer
clan; Leatherface (Yeager) – the chainsaw-wielding
psychopath himself. Naturally, he isn’t so welcoming.
There are so
many things wrong with this film that it’s hard to know where to begin.
First and foremost, it claims to be a direct sequel to a classic that was
released almost forty years ago. In order to grasp the reality of this setting,
Texas Chainsaw 3D claims to be set in the 90’s to justify the age
of its characters in relation to the original. But several small details,
such as the group’s use of hi-tech mobile video recorders, instantly wipe out
any shred of credibility to the story.
all, the idea of suspense seems to be lost on the script, which moves along
with predictable falls, screams and other cheap-scares; overall, a lumbering
mess. Director John Luessenhop moves the story at a snail’s pace and of course,
nothing ever comes of it.
The casting only serves in making this already laughable affair, pitiful.
Daddario, who plays the eye-catching lead, along with her fellow cast mates,
relies on her good looks and nothing more. Yeager, as the psychopathic
Leatherface, is surprisingly reserved and doesn’t get too many spine-chilling
moments to work with.
is yet another desperate attempt to capitalise on what is still considered a
horror classic. How many more sequels and spin-offs we’ll have to endure
remains to be seen.